Fear and Parenting in the Age of AI

One evening, I watched my 8-year-old daughter ask ChatGPT a question. A moment later, she gathered scissors, paint, paper, and even a slice of cheese. Curious, I asked, "What are you doing?" She smiled and said, "I’m making a trap to catch a leprechaun.” In that moment, I felt a wave of relief. Her imagination hadn’t been replaced, it had been expanded. She was prototyping with AI as her sidekick.

As parents, we often fear what we don’t understand. And few things are more uncomfortable than seeing our children step into a world that feels unfamiliar. But fear, at its core, is a signal. It means something we love is at stake.

With the rise of AI, that signal is louder than ever. We’ve already experienced the quiet regret of handing over screens too soon. Of watching social media shape our kids before we understood what it was shaping them into. We know what it feels like to fall behind the curve, and we don’t want to feel that again.

Fear tells us what to pay attention to. It doesn’t have to cause us to panic. If we listen to it properly, our fear can actually enhance our presence. And it can guide from paralysis into purposeful parenting.

When Freezing Isn’t an Option

When faced with something unfamiliar, our instinct is to wait. But AI isn’t waiting. It’s accelerating. We’re still catching our breath from the social media wave, and now a new wave is here. One with even deeper consequences for how our children think, create, and relate to others.

Waiting too long means missing the chance to set the tone. By the time we’re ready, behaviors are already normalized, like using AI to finish homework without reflection, or assuming every question has a perfect answer on demand. Platforms are already baked into habits. Now isn’t the time to freeze, it’s the time to step in.

And it doesn’t take grand gestures. Reclaiming our agency might mean setting screen-time boundaries for AI use, or asking your child to explain what they learned from a chatbot and how they might have answered differently. These small acts can help shape how AI is used in ways that nurture curiosity, creativity, and meaningful engagement, virtues we already try to foster in our homes.

Talking openly about our fears is part of this too. These conversations can help build clarity for yourself, your co-parents, and your kids. What feels right? What feels off? These are household conversations that can shape lifelong habits, and they are the conversations all of us should be having now.

What Are We Really Worried About?

A Better Use of Fear

These fears aren’t mere reflexive overreactions. Fear is a gift from our biology, telling us what to look at more closely, where to stay involved.

As Sasha Fegan wrote in a recent Substack post:

"Is the education system preparing them for the future? Will they have meaningful careers? Is the traditional path through university, with its accompanying mountain of debt, still the right choice? Will the notion of a 'career' seem like a quaint anachronism in 30 years? And, what exactly should I be nagging (I mean supportively encouraging) my kids to do more of?“

That quote captures the real questions behind every parent’s screen-time battle or tech debate: “How do I help my kid grow up confident and grounded in a world I don’t fully understand?”

Even governments are trying to answer this. China, for example, recently made AI education mandatory in schools by age six. They are moving forward without having the answers, stepping in because they recognize that this moment matters. For us as parents, this is our moment too.

We are facing a new kind of technology. One that speaks our language, mimics our reasoning, and interacts with our children in real time. The way we engage with it now will shape how it engages with them later.  

Five Ways to Move from Fear to Framework

• Say What You’re Afraid Of: Out loud. “I’m afraid we’ll forget how to figure things out together.”
• Try an Experiment: Use AI for one school project, and go without it for the next. Compare experiences.
• Set Provisional Rules: “You can use AI to brainstorm, but not to write your final draft.”
• Create a Parent Crew: Don’t do this alone. Share notes. Borrow strategies. Offer support.
• Speak Up: When a tool feels wrong—violates privacy, spreads confusion—report it, review it, talk about it.

The Bottom Line

Fear is not failure. It’s a clue. It says: “Pay attention here.” And when we answer that call not from panic but from care, we become the guides our kids need.

You don’t need to be a tech expert. You just need to be willing to ask better questions, set clearer boundaries, and stay in the loop. Building a community of concern is essential in this moment too.

If you’ve read this far, you’re already doing the work. Now let’s turn awareness into action. Start a conversation, set a new boundary, or help another parent find their footing.

Share this with a fellow parent who’s also wondering how to make sense of it all.

 🎒 Want to raise curious, grounded kids in an AI world?

We’re starting the first Curiosity Craft cohort on May 5 @ 6PM PT.

It’s a 4-week journey for parents who want more than screen-time limits—parents who want to create new family practices around tech, attention, and imagination.

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Connect with us at https://www.curiositycraft.ai/contact for details.